Wondering is Dangerous
by cherrybomb54
Summary: He rolled his eyes and watched her leave. Then he ran inside, slamming the door behind him with a groan. When she was halfway up the street, she screamed so loudly that the birds nesting in their trees flew away." CR/HM One Shot - you know you want too!


**a/n: So this is a weird little story inspired by a personal experience that happened a while ago and my fave couple ship lol but since I don't want it deleted it's Nate yeah? :) It was a rainy day and I was kind of reminiscing...so yeah **

She stared out into the sky. Although she knew she shouldn't, she was thinking about him. It was going to hurt later but she was ready for it, she's made it through worse.

_

* * *

_

He stared at the empty seat next to him. It was where she used to sit when she was there. He didn't like to think about her but he almost always did.

* * *

_Memories came rushing back quickly. As if they'd been repressed for so long that they were pushing to escape. She sighed, remembering how he would ask her what she was doing when she stared at the sky. She never admitted that she was thinking about their future together. Then it ended.

* * *

_

He wondered how things would be if he hadn't pushed her away. Then he remembered her exact words, "You don't throw away someone you love!" And he knew she was right. It felt like someone had kicked him in the stomach, how could he have been so stupid?

* * *

_She longed for his arms, but then quickly cringed away from the thought. Her composure wouldn't hold up much longer if she continued to think like that. Pulling out her iPod and shoving the headphones in her ears, she tried to drown her thoughts.

* * *

_

He finally payed attention to the music that was playing in the background and quickly wished that he hadn't. It was her favourite song. "I'm just sick of you, like when you get sick of a song." He cursed himself under his breath, he knew that hurt her. What a stupid thing to say.

* * *

_Control was a difficult thing for her to grasp, but she was able to pretend on the outside. Yet the inside she was fighting with herself. Debating if she should see him. Not caring if there were any witnesses she slapped herself.

* * *

_

Apologies weren't easy for him; he never did it properly and almost always made the situation worse. He thought he should try to. Even the thought was idiotic; she never wanted to talk to him again. He knew she was a forgiving person, he hurt her too much. It was too late anyway.

* * *

_She wondered why she couldn't let him go. It'd been a year. He'd moved on and that encouraged her to do the same.

* * *

_

Did he really think that a simple apology would change anything? It's not like they can just get back together. They both had someone else.

_

* * *

Didn't that mean that he was happy? Isn't that what she wanted, what she told him to do? _

* * *

He broke his promise to her, he wasn't happy at all. Amazing all the differences she made to his life.

_

* * *

She tried to think about all the good things that came from the break-up. She matured slightly. Minus that rebellious stint she felt at the beginning she was a lot wiser. She wasn't stronger; she was a lot weaker emotionally. Amazing the effects one boy can have._

* * *

He wasn't sure if she actually cared if the promise was broken, they hadn't spoken for months. When they had it was awkward. It felt too formal and much too tense. He envied his brother for having better ties with her.

_

* * *

She thought about how she tried to get the complete opposite of him, so she wouldn't get hurt again. She was hurt. Not by the poor excuse of a human being his replacement was, but by the fact the plan failed because it wasn't what she really wanted._

* * *

He thought about how he tried to get someone just like her because he missed her so much. Sure, they were nice and cute but his heart belonged to someone else. That someone didn't want it anymore.

_

* * *

With an annoyed sigh, she lifted herself from the ground and brushed the dirt from her legs. She had enough. She was going to fix this._

* * *

He lay there miserably, wallowing in guilt. He couldn't even bring himself to write a song out of the situation.

_

* * *

She knocked urgently on the door. Her breathing was fast, it matched her heartbeat. Her fists clenched in annoyance with herself. She should really stop making impulse decisions._

* * *

Rolling his eyes in frustration, he grudgingly walked to the door. He had to be home alone. He had to be feeling miserable. Someone always had to come over.

* * *

Miley was turning to leave when Nate opened the door, with a miserable expression. She didn't feel numb as the empty feeling in her chest pushed to the surface as quickly as her memories. The miserable expression was caused by her unannounced presence.

Dreams weren't usually this vivid. Normally his dreams of her are when she was happy. Miley wasn't happy here. There was the hint of tears in her eyes. Nate's body lurched forward at its own will, as if he had no control and his arms wrap around her.

Her eyes widen, this act pushed the tears over the edge of her eyes and they landed on his shirt. She now knew why she went to see him. She has no control over her dreams.

Nate forced himself to pull away and look into her eyes; Miley knew that he had trouble apologising. She would have to give him credit for trying.

She knew this wasn't a dream when he pulled away. In her dreams he would wrap his arms around her and never let go. His eyes were still sad, but he hugged her. Miley was confused now.

"I'm so sorry for the things I said, a long time ago. You deserve a good one, I mean you've had to wait this long to hear it. But you know I'm horrible at these things." He paused to catch his breath. She was frowning at him; she was becoming even more confused by the second. Miley's sense of reality and her imagination were mixed up.

"I had no idea that it was going to be like this. I thought it would be better if we were just friends. I'm not even sure why I thought like that! I was a jerk and I let everything that was going on around us get to me, when I shouldn't have. I shouldn't have hurt you like that either, that was really dumb. If I could go back in time I would just so I could punch myself! What happened, it really messed us up. I should have taken it back straight away but I was a coward. I'm sorry. Sorry a million times over and then some. I just want to be friends again, I know I don't deserve it but, I miss you. A lot."

Miley slowly closed her mouth; it'd been hanging open from the moment she realised that this was actually happening and that he was finally apologising. She pulled her arms back, forcing Nate to let go of her. Then she wiped away the tears from her eyes and took a step back.

"I have to say sorry for a few things too." She took a deep breath before she went on with her own. "I'm sorry for trying to humiliate you. It was wrong and although it feels like you deserve it, I guess it's just a part of life. Some break-ups are bad and some are, well...easier to handle. We got unlucky and had a bad one. I'm also sorry for going crazy and all that stuff. I know I shouldn't have done it and you probably didn't care about it either but I still feel like I should apologise. I'm sorry for backstabbing you and saying things that you weren't, it was done out of anger. I'm also sorry for telling everyone about us, I know that you wanted it to be a secret but it was over and I thought that it didn't apply anymore. "

It was all out on the table, all but one thing. The problem was neither had the guts to say it.

"I forgive you." He said without a moment of deliberation. "Please tell me you forgive me." His eyes were pleading. She couldn't bear to look at him. He had apologised, that's what she wanted. Yet, she still hurt.

"I don't think I can." She whispered. He blinked.

"Okay, I guess I can understand that." He said in the same quiet voice.

"I can try though." She bit her lip.

He shook his head, "I don't want to force you."

"You aren't forcing me. I want to forgive you. I just...can't." Miley made her voice stronger to prove that she meant it.

"If you want to forgive me then you could. Obviously there's something stopping that." The way Nate said it was close to being harsh. She felt it.

"Maybe it's because I don't want to be hurt again!" She was yelling now and she didn't care who heard. This only angered Nate, something he wasn't often.

"Do you really think I would do that again to you? To both of us?" He accused.

"Do you know how it felt for you to just...break-up with me like that? It was like I didn't even know you!" She threw back at him.

"Yes, I do. You told the whole world how you cried for about a month!" They were both yelling now, glaring at each other. "Just forget it and leave, okay?"

"Gladly." She turned but then looked back at him.

"What?" The hurt was in Nate's eyes but she was blinded by her own tears.

"You're hair looked better longer." She snapped and stormed away from his house.

* * *

He rolled his eyes and watched her leave. Then he ran inside, slamming the door behind him with a groan.

_

* * *

When she was halfway up the street, she screamed so loudly that the birds nesting in their trees flew away._

* * *

All that was said were words that left one another as broken as they were to begin with. Nothing was fixed, something they had both feared. The apologies were too late, more tears were being shed and the one thing that may have fixed their relationship was left unspoken...

**They still love each other.**

**S'watcha think? Review please it's been a while since I wrote something that I felt worth posting. Also the next chapter of One Punch, One Blush, One Kiss and I'm letting you down will be up soon :)  
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